I can’t even imagine what French Canadian Borg would be like!
Being Canadian I want to make a joke about them insisting on having a separate culture while also being acknowledged as part of the Collective. But I won’t because I don’t want to betray my roots with something offensive.
They fly these.
That’s explains why they assimilated a Frenchman to be their emissary.
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Les résistance est futile
Nah, they pretended they couldn’t understand what Locutus was saying.
“We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Your culture will adapt to service us. If you resist us, sorry, but we’re going to assimilate you anyway.”
Wow, that’s so much less threatening. I might’ve been totally OK being with being assimilated if this is what they said instead.
Never underestimate the exasperatingly sneaky power of of a Canadian wielding “Sorry (not sorry)”.
2
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Fortunately, there is a maple syrup strategic stockpile.
Unfortunately, someone robbed it a while back.
A grave and delicious offense against the Canadian people
Sorry.
The Supreme Court of Canada took a very dim view of the heist and required restitution.(SCC decision on maple syrup heist)
Such a Canadian thing.
KEY FACTS (from the linked article)
The court unanimously ruled Richard Vallières must pay the multi-million dollar fine, reversing a lower court order that only fined him 1 million Canadian dollars ($800,000).
The fine, along with another 830,000 Canadian dollar ($665,000) penalty he’s been ordered to pay under a separate court order, roughly total the 10 million Canadian dollars ($8 million) Vallières and his associates sold stolen maple syrup for in the early 2010s.
Vallières was found guilty in 2016 of stealing 9,500 barrels worth of syrup from a warehouse in Saint-Louis-de-Blandford, Quebec, that belonged to the Federation of Quebec Maple Syrup Producers (FPAQ), which tightly regulates production and sales of the region’s maple syrup.
The syrup had a market value of more than 18 million Canadian dollars ($14.4 million), but Vallières said at his trial it was sold at a lower price.
He is currently serving an eight-year prison sentence.
No money can make up for that much loss of syrup (☍﹏⁰)。
Unpopular opinion.
We know that the Borg assimilated at least one Ferengi. Which means they should have been masters of advertising and salesmanship. Granted, the loss of a few dozen units is irrelevant to the collective, but it would have been nice to see some “T Serve Man…” style sneakiness instead of the usual nastiness.
Bonus. Old time science fiction about an ad man and some aliens.
https://epdf.pub/william-tenn-betelgeuse-bridgeae279865a7cef0cbc198d0e2d228995e70924.html
Betelgeuse Bridge by William Tenn.